No one likes to hear their baby cry, so the pacifier, or dummy, might seem like a wonderful invention. However, its use can have serious consequences on the emotional well being of a baby.

 

Babies cry for a variety of reasons: they're hungry, thirsty, cold, hot or feeling unwell. These are the reasons that we expect and generally we can react to these reasons and treat them.

 

However, sometimes a baby will cry without a particularly clear reason. How often do parents find their baby crying between feeds, or because a certain event has just happened?

 

This crying can often be an attempt by the baby to release its stress. If you think about the life of a baby, it has just been born and is discovering for the first time a lot of new stimulation that we take for granted. TV, microwaves, cellphones, cars, markets, shops and malls can all be sources of stress for a newborn. That's okay, a child needs to learn about them.

 

In processing all of this new stimuli, a baby may begin to feel stressed, or may just need to exteriorize what they feel in order to process it. As an adult, when we exteriorize, we usually talk with someone. For a baby this talking can often come out as crying.

 

 

Using a pacifier is basically telling your baby to "shut up." They have something very important to tell you about what they're feeling or experiencing, and your reaction is to tell them you're not interested.

 

What could be worse for baby's feeling of self-worth than you telling them that what they have to say is of no value?

 

The respected child psychologist, Dr Aletha Solter, suggests that a child who is given a pacifier will use it as a control mechanism to deal with their stress, but instead of externalizing it, will use the control mechanism to try and keep it controlled within their mind. 

 

She suggests that a baby with a control mechanism may look happy and contented, and may require less intervention from the parents, but as they are repressing emotions, they will be harboring pent-up stress.

 

 

According to Dr Solter, if a baby is sucking their thumb, it means that they are harboring pent-up stress, and the way to act is to help the baby release its stress through controlled crying in a caring environment.

 

There is no circumstance where it's a good thing for a child to have a pacifier. They are better off without one and better off being in an environment with close physical contact where they can cry freely about their stress and be listened to lovingly.

Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/fimbrethil/3235904023 and http://www.flickr.com/photos/thesoftlanding/2853374039